I feel like I have so much to say about today. I think it is going to take me a couple days to sort through everything in my mind because so much has happened today. I started the day out by being anxious. I was nervous about what today was going to look like and what I was going to do to let go of this anger and sadness. I knew I was going to dinner with some friends to a very special restaurant, but I wasn't sure about anything else. It all came to me around noon how I wanted the day to be. I knew that I had to tell my parents today that I loved them and I had to do that in person.
Keep in mind it has been close to four years since I have been at my parents house. I was extremely nervous about just showing up. Since my Dad loves it when you have a clean car I even went and washed my car before going. As I drove in front of their house I realized my brother was there. I did not want to stop with him there because I did not want any drama. I was so upset as I drove off because I thought this was my only time to do tell them. I then decided that after dinner would be a good time.
MJ and our friend L came by and we headed off to the restaurant. The top picture was the view we had. This restaurant means so much to me because it's on the lake where my parents had a cabin when I was growing up. There are so many good memories on this particular lake and I knew it was the perfect place to honor and celebrate my parents.
We had a couple cold drinks which tasted like heaven because of the heat and of course the view.
Here is MJ and L. Dinner was so nice because we laughed so much and I shared a lot of the good times I had with my parents and my favorite memories. However, this picture was taken after I taught them the word, "fucktard". Neither of them had heard it and they about peed their pants because they were laughing so hard.
Dinner was perfect. I love lobster and had the fried lobster. Oh.My.God. It was so good. I can't believe I forgot to take a picture of our desert. It was a chocolate Multan Cake. There really are no words to describe how good the desert it.
Me and MJ in her car.
After dinner I made the drive to my parents. I found it kind of sad that I was so nervous about going to my parents house. I did not take MJ and L with me because I felt that I could not handle it on my own, I just wanted to have my friends there with me so I could share with them what happened. I knew it was going to turn out OK and I wanted to share that goodness with someone. And it did turn out good; very good.
As I walked up to my parents front door I felt like a small child again who was just wanting to be loved by her parents. As I knocked on the front door I knew it was finally time to let go of my anger and resentment.
....to be continued