For all those wondering if I made it back to the city...Yes I did come home without too much of a fight. It was a great day and I have come back to the city with some idea what it would be like to be Laura Ingalls Wilder. I promise to post more about my visit tomorrow.I do want to address a few of the comments I have received in the last few weeks. I love all the comments I get and am so thankful that people are willing to take time out of their busy day to read my blog.
I do want my readers to know that I am working hard at letting things go with my family. I do agree that I tend to hold on to the past a little bit and it's something I am working hard at changing. My Mom used to always tell me that I lived in the past and I realize that I am still doing that. I don't know why I have done this, but I do realize it's not healthy for me.
It's not only hard realizing you need to make changes in your life, but it's also very hard trying to figure out how to do make that change.
So I ask for your patience while I figure everything out. And even though I have come a long way in the last year, I know I still have a lot of changes to make. And to be honest....sometimes I get really scared when I think of all the changes I need to make.
4 comments:
I think you are doing great. On the subject of moving on, it is your brother who doesn't really need to be here with this ramblings. I can only suggest that you erase his comments after June 1 and dont give him a forum. I think this will make it easier for you. He can get his own blog somewhere.
Step by step my friend. I think you are doing great with all the changes you have made. YOu have come such a long way from where you were last year, I can only hope that I am in such a great state next year like you.
I'm glad you had a good time. I know it did you good to get away from the city for a few hours.
As to letting go of the past .... Well, you do and you don't need to, as I told you recently. You have some very good memories as well as the others. I say it is OK to hang on to those good ones. They more or less ground you in who you are, one of the kindest people I know.
I sorta live in the past, too. I tend to prefer music from my school days and my early adulthood and listen to it a lot, and I remember fondly people and events from those days. I love paging through a yearbook or a stack of old photos. But the bad memories I have from those days I have released for the most part. Of course, we can't ever completely forget them, but I rarely think of the hurtful times.
In addition to the oldies music, I listen to blues, classical, jazz, etc. Those are good, as well. And I think about what is going on in my life now, reveling in the happiness I enjoy on a regular basis. I sometimes marvel at who I've become in my late years, living alone and learning who I am. And so will you. Feel free to crush what gives you negative feelings, and continue, as you've done well at over this last year, replacing them will newer memories of your good life. You will continue to be better and better as time goes on!
I think you are one hellava great person!!
I'm off to a festival for a few hours. Might call you later.
Granted.... you know we are with you every step of the way even if you regress now and then. You're only human and it won't be easy to "let go".
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