During the conversation she talked about how Sharon's ex was upset around the beginning of September because it would have been their 7th anniversary. I understand Sharon's ex being upset. Laura was putting her down and I came to Jen's defense. I was so tired of Laura talking about how they two of them did not like how Jen was reacting to the whole break-up etc. As far as I am concerned, it's none of Laura or Sharon's business how Jen or I reacted to the break-up. If they are upset at our reactions, they need to remember they created all of this drama. Well, during this conversation Laura asked if I was talking to Jen. In April Laura had forbid me to talk to Jen. Stupid me played along with Laura, but in June I was tired of listening to Laura. So, when Jen left a comment on my blog I emailed her and we started talking. Jen and I don't talk alot, but occasionally we will email or IM each other. So when Laura asked me I told her that yes Jen and I were talking a little, but it had been a couple months since we had talked. I really thought it was none of her business to be asking who I am talking to, but I did not say anything. Laura then said how she hoped at some point we could be friends. I explained to her that at this point I can not trust her and that if we were to ever be friends she would have to work at regaining my trust.
Wednesday night I had emailed Laura about something and she never responded. (big surprise) So as I was on my way to work this morning I called Laura to see if she had read my email. She told me she went into her hotmail account, but my email was not there. I told her what was in the email and we hung up. Not two minutes later she called me back and said she lied about the email. Yes she had read the email but she was so upset that I was talking to Jen that she did not respond to the email and then lied about it today. She said when we got off the phone a few minutes earlier she was wondering if she really was a trust worthy person since she had just lied to me.
I am not sure why it shocked me so much that she lied to me again, but after the conversation we had just had it did surprise me.
Here are a couple things that Laura needs to realize:
- The day she broke up with me she lost the right to tell me who I can and cannot talk to.
- I really don't care that she is upset with me
- I think it funny that she is worried that Jen and I are talking. She must not be telling Sharon all of the truth about herself because she seems very concerned. BTW, there are some things I know for a fact that Laura has not told Sharon that I really think she should, but I would never out of malice tell Sharon. I am not and have never been that kind of person.
I love that I live my life with honesty. Life is so much easier when you don't have to worry about which story you have told this person or that person. One day Sharon will find out about all that Laura is not telling her; not because I would say something, but because it will come out in Laura's character or lack of character for that matter.
I try to live my life by what someone once told me: It's none of my business what anyone thinks of me.
You can not imagine how peaceful life is with that motto as well as always being honest.
10 comments:
It's fascinating to me that Laura could imagine that she can dictate anything about how you live your life. I expect that her dishonesty will cause her much more trouble than being honest ever would.
My wife and I have been together for almost 25 years. We are always honest with each other I think that's why we've lasted.
Well, really, no one has the right to tell anyone who they can talk to, whether they are in a relationship with you or not. I cannot in a million years imagine Chris telling me not to talk to someone!
Great motto. I need to remember that one a little more often.
I agree with Amy. Even IN the relationship it was not her right to tell you who you could and couldn't talk with. She could tell you how SHE was feeling about it but the ultimate decision regarding talking with the person in question was always up to you. Or - it should have been.
Telling the truth is the only way to go. Lies of omission are still lies. Truth it must be because that is just the only way to live. Speak your truth. It's more valuable than anything.
chelle--she loves to be in control and i think it's killing her that she can no longer tell me what to do. what she is not telling sharon will indeed cause her problems once sharon realizes she has not been honest
amy--very good point. can you tell i grew up in a cult?? :)
katie--i can't remember who told me that, but it's something i remind myself almost everyday
casey--for so long i was living a lie (not being honest about being gay) and life is so much better now that i am honest with everyone including myself.
May Laura have to wallow in her own deceit and skullduggery one day. That's all I have to say.
Well, except that, once again, I am proud of how you handled it. Yay!!
I don't think anyone would begrudge you should you decide to spill the beans on Laura. Working SA, you know how often the patients try to not only pick and choose their behaviors, but then try and dictate the consequences...Laura reminds me of those kind of folks.
lynilu--it's all about karma. whatever she is sending out into the world (and we all know what that is) she WILL get back one day.
anonymous--what an excellent point. it seems like you know laura because all of your comments seem to describe Laura to a T.
You rock Caroline...so glad to see you getting stronger as time goes by!
Honey you are abslutely right and like chelle I am ... I don't know what I am - but Laura has some nerve thinking she can dictate who you can-cannot talk to!
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