So today I was just in a pissy mood. Something happened at work that pissed me off and it just seemed to go downhill from there. I tried all day to get out of my stooper, but nothing seemed to work. Poor Laura was thinking I was upset at her because she has been sick. She was thinking that I was upset because since she has been sick she hasn't been able to cook our dinners, etc. I tried to tell her that I was in no way upset at her, but I would have a hard time believing someone that was walking around the house with a "pissed off" look also.
So, when I got off work I went to the gym. I was tired. But I decided to go anyway. I thought, the best way to get rid of some of my frustrations is to work them off at the gym. And I worked all right. Sometimes it's hard to go two or three days in a row, but today I felt like I needed to go. 5 minutes into my workout, I was feeling so much better. It's amazing how working your muscles and opening your lungs to let air in makes you feel better.
We started going back to the gym on October 25. It's been a little over a month now. I know I keep saying this, but I have never felt better. To date, I have lost 15 pounds. It's amazing how 15 pounds can make you feel so much better; not only physically, but also mentally. I feel proud of myself when I wake up now.
Some days are struggles. There are days when I want nothing more then to eat McDonalds for lunch. Instead, I have my turkey sandwich (on wheat) and eat lots of fruits and veggies. Here are my main reasons for wanting to lose weight and change my life:
1) I want to be able to look at myself in the mirror without saying, "God, you are so fat".
2) Laura: I want her to be so proud of me when she looks at me and I want her to LOVE what she sees when she is looking at me. (Laura has always said that it doesn't matter how much I weight and I truly and honestly believe her, but I can look better)
3) I want to prove to myself that I can lose this weight without any diet aids or quick fix diets
4) I want to take control of my diabetes and not let it control my life or how I feel
5) One day Laura and I want to have a child and I want to bring that child into the world being the best I can be physically as well as mentally
6) I want to be able to shop at any store and not worry if they have an XL
7) I don't want to feel that I am the fattest person in the room
8) I want to look awesome when we go to Florida in April
9) I want the jeans that I wore on Thanksgiving to be too big for me
10) I want to be able to turn heads when I am walking down the street (Don't worry Laura, you will always be my love) :)
Losing weight is one of the hardest things I have ever done. I have tried for the past ten years on a regular basis to lose weight. I want to win this battle this time. I want to be able to say, "see I told you I could do it". I want my life to be focused on more then just my weight.
One day I will get there. I will not give up this time. I have too many things to keep me motivated this time.
8 comments:
I'm you'll be able to do it. Just keep motivated. :)
I don't know if you ever watch the biggest loser but that show is about losing weight. It is inspiring to watch them accomplish that. I think almost all people (especially women) can appreciate how hard weight loss can be....and the self image issues.
Glad to hear it's going so well for you...keeep up the great work.
You'll be so happy with the results.
Shelly
I have a great diet!!!
Divorce your husband and become a lesbian!!!!!!
Oh, wait.
I guess that one won't work!
Thanks for all the great comments. We do watch The Biggest Loser. We were really rooting for Suzy because she is so cute. It's amazing how much weight they lost.
You are doing great! I am so proud of you. I must sit the record straight on something; had you informed me that you WERE upset with me because I had not been cooking dinner, all hell would've broken loose. I'm not that sweet. Laura
That is why I knew not to get upset about dinner. :) I knew you probably would have killed me and then kicked the dog.--hehe
You sound very committed to your weight loss goal. I'm really proud of you and I respect that enormously because it is not an easy thing to do....but you are doing it!
I struggle with my weight and need to be focused and committed.
Also, I agree, the exercise does wonders for the mind and the mood. I'm usually in a better mood after exercising, too. I just need to get out there and keep at it like you are doing!
Congratulations!
Thanks franscesa. It's hard work, but the payoff it well worth it. It helps having someone that I can lose weight with. Laura and I are able to encourage each other. It's great
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